DVNLP Kongress Hamburg,


15:30 – 17:00

Liebe praktisch umsetzen - die 14 Grundformen der Liebe:

Our Tutorials are grouped into five categories:

  • The Tutorials 1-14 deal with the typical trouble spots in a loving relationship and their resolution.

  • The Tutorials 15-18 deal with the way in which couples can talk to each other lovingly.

  • The Tutorial 19 describes a relationship game.

in preparation:

  • The Tutorials 21-29 deal with the deepening of the themes from 1-14 and the practical implementation of the solution elements.

  • The Tutorials 30-40 deal with fundamental obstacles on the path to happiness and how these can be overcome.


Ground rules / Foundations of a stable relationship

On the one hand, there are a thousand reasons why couples can find themselves in a conflict. The task is to solve the conflicts while supporting the couple. However, there are not thousands of strategies and there are not 1000 completely different insights that help people resolve their problems - certainly not from our point of view.
Our tutorials are based on the observation that there seems to be 14 "families" of conflicts. Regardless of the undeniable uniqueness of every relationship, it just seems the study of these superordinate 14 conflict families enables couples to take their partnership to a new, happy basis in which they affirm and realize the 14 relationship rules for themselves, which are schematically hidden at the core of the conflicts.

Tutorials 1 to 14:

Topics     Partner's accusations
The meaning of "No!"
  • You don't respect me!
  • You think only of yourself!
  • You only do what you want!
Tutorial 1
Coping lovingly with disorders
which affect the relationship.
  • What do I get from you!
  • I always lose out!
Tutorial 2
Coping lovingly with the
wishes of the partner.
  • You don't listen to me!
  • I'm not important!
  • You don't know me at all!
Tutorial 3
  The next tutorials are in translation!  
Coping lovingly with sexuality

  • You don't really love me!
  • You always have migraine!
Tutorial 4
Coping lovingly with the wish to
have children.
  • You don't want to have children!
  • You don't believe we have a future!
Tutorial 5
Focus on my partner's welfare.
  • You always leave me in the dark!
  • You never tell me what's happening
    or wrong!
Tutorial 6
Making choices in love.
  • You only think of yourself!
  • You are selfish!
  • I'm not really important to you!
Tutorial 7
Sexual fidelity.
  • You are unfaithful!
  • I can't depend on you!
  • I don't trust you!
Tutorial 8
Coping lovingly and sensibly
with joint resources.
(Time, money, tasks)
  • You only think of yourself!
  • You are leaving me in the lurch!
  • Grow up!
Tutorial 9
Coping lovingly with conflict.
  • You always criticise!
  • I can never please you!
Tutorial 10
Loving sympathy.
  • You don't listen to me!
  • You are not interested in me!
Tutorial 11
Loving loyalty in the
  • You critisise me in front of others!
  • You make a fool of me at
    every opportunity!
  • You don't give me any security!
Tutorial 12
Harmonious upbringing
  • You don't respect me!
  • You trample on my authority!
  • What I say doesn't count at all!
Tutorial 13
Coping lovingly with our
responsibility towards society
  • You are not interested in anything!
  • What are we leaving behind really?
  • You don't assume any responsibility!
Tutorial 14

Talking to each other lovingly, or the art of communication!

Tutorials 15 to 18:

Topics    Partners accusations Tutorials
The loving ear.
  • You don't listen to me!
  • You are not interested in what I think
    or feel!
Tutorial 15
Coping lovingly with the hesitant
Yes and with the hesitant No.
Coping lovingly with Not really
  • You don't understand me!
  • You talked me into it -
    actually I did not want it!
  • Actually, you just want your own way!
Tutorial 16
Coping lovingly with a
different opinion.
Coping lovingly with yes-but.
  • Do you listen to me really?
  • You know it all!
  • You are not the only who
    has rights!(who is right?)
Tutorial 17
Coping lovingly with critism.
  • I can't say anything to you!
  • You can't deal with critism!
Tutorial 18
Talk lovingly to each other
  • Summary:
Tutorial 15-18

A special relationship game

Tutorial 19:

Topic     Partner's accusations
The joint fathoming
of character traits
and its implementation in
daily life
  • You don't strive for me!
  • You are not interested in me!
Tutorial 19



Further tutorials in preparation: